Tuesday, April 15, 2008

I miss you, Mom

Mom above at age 17
Mom and Dad

Hard to believe that a year ago today my mother passed from this life.

She did not read to us....we read to ourselves, or to each other.
My mom never made our Halloween costumes, we made our own.
She never decorated our birthday cakes or sang us to sleep.
.....HOWEVER, she was always there for us...always listened to us....put us before anything she wanted for herself. I never heard her say a bad word about anyone, ever. I've often thought that I was raised by Pollyanna.
We saw her take her church callings very seriously and saw her take care of the neighbors when they were sick or needed anything.
During my childhood my mom had a baby about every 2 years. This was a GREAT way to grow up.

However, as the oldest daughter, she never wanted me to feel overworked or taken advantage of so she always praised me like crazy and always thanked me for helping her. Sometimes I would get in bed at night and find a little gift under my pillow….maybe a candy bar or a magazine I wanted along with a little note of appreciation.

Back row: John, Peggy
Middle: Richard, Jill, Robin
Front: Heidi, Scott, Chris

I grew up going with my mom often to visit people in rest homes, care centers, and hospitals. My parents use to own an extra little house they they rent out to a young couple with several children. When this couple would come over to pay rent each month my mom always has a sack of clothing for them or some toys. This was so very typical of my mother.

I had read through some of her journals during the past several weeks that she had been sick. I came across a quote she obviously liked because she had it glued onto one of the pages. It says, and I don’t know who said it, “There is no progression from ease to ease.”

She also had written in bold in her journal another quote and this one is by Emerson:
“All I have seen teaches me to trust in the Creator for all I have not seen.”

I have memories of coming home from school each day and finding my mom waiting for us. She would often be lying with one leg drapped over the back of the sofa, reading a magazine and eating a chocolate candy bar. She had the ability to relax with little children all around her. I don’t mean to give the impression that mom was lazy because she worked harder than any other mom I knew…….but she knew to relax about 3pm each day….right before the rest of us would come in the door from school. She would be there ready to listen to us. I would talk and talk and talk and I don’t know how she did it, but NOT ONCE do I ever remember her having anything more important to do than listen to me.

My mom never “sweat the small stuff” if it did not matter in the eternal perspective then it just did not matter. Back in the 60s when us girls were still wearing dresses every day to school….one day my hem came out of my dress and I was in a panic as I was going out the door. Mom just took some masking tape and quickly taped it up for me. I asked her, “But what if the wind blows and it falls out? Or what if at recess I fall in a puddle? Or what if it rains and soaks the tape off? (I was her worried child) So she just put the whole roll of tape in my pocket and said, “Here take this. You’ll be fine.”

In my adult life Mom told me she would begin each day with a prayer asking Heavenly Father to send her that day to where she was needed the most. THAT is how she planned her days. She gave and gave and gave of herself…where ever she could, where ever she was needed…..and she was also one of the happiest people I ever knew.

Back: Chris, Heidi, Robin, John, Richard, Scott
Sitting: Jill, Dad, Mom, Peggy

My mom lived a very Christ like life., and I and my siblings continually reap the blessings of that.

I was asleep the last hour before she passed away. I had a dream that she was up and walking. I said to her, "Mom what are you doing up?" She said, "I'm all better now." Just then the phone rang and it was my dad wanting to know how she was doing. I walked into the family room where she had been lying for the past 3 1/2 weeks, unable to even roll over by herself. I touched her and she was very warm but I could tell she was gone. It wasn't until hours later that I put it all together. She told me she was all better. And from that moment she was. I have no doubt that she came to get Robin, her granddaughter, last Friday evening. They are both all better. What a joyful day it will be when we are with them again.



The Gage Cage said...

I love the tape story. How cute is that! I never knew your mom but Paul raves about her. He told me she was a wonderful, one in a million lady. I guess the saying "The apple doesn't fall far from the tree." is true.

My family has a website that we use to to keep in touch. I posted the website about Robin. My sister in Utah,Jen, was looking at it. She was telling her husband, Jason Oyler, about it. He came to look at the pics. He realized that he knows Robins husband. I guess her husband was a missionary companion with Jason's younger brother Cole. At BYU they lived close to each other. They didn't hang out a ton, but had Cole in common and would talk here and there. I hope I'm making sense. It is such a small world.

I'm glad Robin gets to be with her amazing Grandma and that they are both all better!

logan heasley said...

I really enjoyed your blog. Your mother was wonderful. I hope my kids will have some great memories of me like you do of your mother. Your such a wonderful mother too! You did a fantastic job raising your 4 boys. I have been amazingly impressed!!!!

grandmapeg said...

As always you did a wonderful job with this entry. It is still hard to believe that I met your mother in person before you and I met in person. You obviously are following in your mother's footsteps and that is such a great compliment to her!

Poduska Family said...

Those are beautiful pictures! Thank you for sharing them.

Ann said...

Hi Gramma Honey, sorry for stopping by to read your blog.Im glad to have chance to read your happy memories with family.I cried after finish reading this,it make me thinking of my grandmother.

Everyday is happy day, cheers :) We must appreciate the every moments we have.