We have to wait to learn the answer...

Today my Dad would be 89! 

I'm glad my Dad is not still with us, because that would mean he would still be suffering, and we're so thankful he's not. 

We know he's happy. 

I do reflect back to last February 12th...just 2 days before he passed. This was the last time he sat in his wheel chair. 

Normally he would ask me to get his friend Barbara across the hall when he was having a hard time...or even when he wasn't. 

But on that day when I asked, "Do you want me to get Barbara?" He said flatly and firmly, "No." 

She came anyway. 





She wasn't able to comfort him this time. So after she left,  I just sat on the nearby couch and watched my Dad.

He was completely awake and aware, yet I found it curious that he kept raising his arms up and out like he was trying to grab something in the air. He did this over and over again. I'd never seen him do anything like this. 

I wish, I so wish now, I would have asked him why he was doing that. He would have told me. But I didn't. 

I finally got my camera out and tried to capture what I saw but by then it wasn't as obvious, but you can still kind of see in these pictures. 

He looks asleep here, but he wasn't. 
And no, his eyes weren't totally closed.

He hadn't had good use of his hands in a long time, but he's trying to grab whatever it is he sees with his index finger and thumb. 

 Later when I asked hospice about this, they told me it's very common for a person to do as they get close to passing. His hospice nurse told me the dying try to grasp something invisible.  

Something invisible? Maybe to us, but not to him.

Then I mentioned this to someone else, but can't remember who it was. A friend? My sister? I don't remember, but they offered this idea, "He may be seeing people from the other side. And maybe he is trying to reach out and touch them."  

He did mention to my sister Robin, I think the next day, something about Gaynor. (our Mom) She couldn't make out his words but she did hear Gaynor. 

Perhaps that's who he was seeing? 

We aren't privileged to know that, yet. But someday we will. And someday our Dad will be able to tell us all about that day, and 2 days later when he passed, and all the days since. 

I can tell this cartoon was saved by my Mom since it was cut with pinking sheers. 

Two life changing products

1. I'd been searching for the perfect ball point pen for months. 
No, honestly, make that years. 

I don't like gel pens, and all the ball point pens in this house leak or pool ....like this..

So my brother Richard was here visiting from Alpine, Utah and I asked him. He's very opinionated. I knew this, so why didn't I ask him first?? 

He went right out to his car and got one of his "perfect" pens, and then he ordered me a box of them! 

They're perfect. Seriously. 
They write micro thin, don't dribble or pool or leak. 


On amazon they are only $8.38 for a box of 12. 
Cheap pens that don't write cheap.


2. Oh this lunch bag...how I love it. This is not an insulated bag. No. It's much better than that. It is lined front and back with freezable gel that keeps the food as cold as if you had it in an ice chest.

You can see the little ice crystals on it. 

I keep it flat in our freezer, ready to use at anytime. 

I take food with me often, where ever I go. 
Even to church. Last Sunday this is what I packed:

egg sandwich, cucumbers, cut up apple, bell pepper slices, cashews, avocado, yogurt, and oat milk.

And it all fit in nicely! 

Despite our hot summers, the food will stay COLD for hours! Even left in a hot car, at least for 3 hours that I know of. 

Some of my grands have tried using this lunch bag for their school lunches. They tell me it's all so crispy cold at lunch time, several hours later. 

May seem a little pricey at $18.51 on Amazon, but to me, totally worth it. 

They have some fun colored ones that cost a little more, but I like the black. It's more discreet. 

With as many places as I carry food, discreet is good.

I Pray When....

This little video just pulled me in....so I had to share!

Bless You, Chick-fil-A!

I'm honored to be related to them

My cousin Kristine... 

She's the daughter of my Dad's sister Ann 
and was raised an only child. 

She married and had 4 daughters. 

Kris and her husband are very faithful Catholics 

and have raised all their children in that faith. 

I wanted to share here what Kris's oldest granddaughter Taylor posted on FB recently:

"I’m the oldest of 20 cousins.
Madison is devoting her life to nursing and caring for those in need.
Jakob has always had the best grades and challenges others to be better.
Emily recognizes the small things in others and is always there to listen.
Kaden is the gentle and very athletic giant and is favored by every baby, kid and adult he meets. 
Zac is always there to give you a laugh and cheer you up on a bad day.
Lauryn studies hard and pays attention to the things that makes others happy.
Jaycie is thoughtful and wise beyond her years. Doesn’t give into what others think or say.
Chase has the kindest heart and recognizes the need for help before it’s asked.
Reagan goes out of her way to include all her little cousins in whatever the big kids are doing.
Dane is going to be a great leader someday, it comes naturally
Cole is competitive and this is what will drive him toward success.
Reese is as sweet as her name 
Blake may not always be my biggest fan but he’d sure go out of his way to make his mom happy.
Grant is hopefully my ticket to Heaven when he becomes a priest someday and he’s a major goof.
Brooklyn has one of the most active imaginations and tells you the truth when you need to hear it.
Camden is shy, yet shows affection to those who really get to know him.
Blair has the most beautiful innocence about her and reminds me of my grandma everyday.
Kate is sweet and sour depending on the day.
Jack is the littlest one of the bunch and I can’t wait to see him form into his own person.

As you can see, each different in their own way, each a blessing to our family and each able to figure out God’s plan for them because their parents chose life. The recent decisions made to not recognize life of the unborn is absolutely heartbreaking. In the midst of what feels like the loss of a huge battle, I am thankful for my family and not only their pro life beliefs but for being (extremely) open to life and for raising all those humans with the same beliefs. 

I am pro life and always will be."


And THIS, what Kris shared on her FB page sums it up SO well...

Three Unrelated things

1. Scarlett is in kindergarten and was chosen as student of the week! Here's the poster she made to show to her class....

See all those states? Those are all the ones she has been in. 
McKenna said they didn't even include states 
they just drove through, but didn't stop!  
And she's only five!

I think she's got me beat. By about 15 states. 

2. My diagnosis after my labs came back from my gum surgery:

My periodontist told me his best guess is I got this abscess from getting my teeth cleaned the week before. 

I didn't even know that could happen!

 I was even told by the dental hygienist during that cleaning that my gums were "very healthy looking." 

How does one prevent this happening during a cleaning? 

I don't know, 

but after a month of antibiotics, pain and 6 dental visits,

I'm trying to learn! 

3. I have a friend who is a therapist 

and she had this picture posted on FB:

She said it's the story of her life and it's exhausting. 

I say, imagine if we all had such insight into others. 

No one could get mad at anyone. 

Clever people and good people

My sister brought over a binder full of the old Rozier Times 
so I could look through them. 




I found lots of treasures between those pages...
and below is one of those treasures.

(I'm guessing my Mom sent this one in.)

From issue #22, December 1989.

I don't know much about Solomon Bennett Freehof, 
only that he lived from 1892-1990. 

Whoever he was,
my guess is he wrote this later in life,
because his acquired wisdom was showing.

Aww, if we could only live life backwards. 

I still like clever people though. I just like good people better. 

Part of Mother's Day 2019

This morning for Mother's Day 

we got to attend Brock and Erin's ward.

AND, we got to have Cami sit right between us.

She was so good, complete with her hands folded.

Her parents tell me she LOVES church.

This was the opening song 

and I can never hear it without thinking of my Dad.

He would have us all sing this growing up 

at just about every Family Home Evening we had. 

Off key, and sounding... not good. 

But he would sing it with passion!

Annoying at the time, but sort of sweet to think back on. 

We came to hear Violet give a talk.

She's only 8, so this was a bit unusual.

Normally kids are 12 

before they are asked to speak in Sacrament meeting.

In her talk, I LOVE Violet's explanation of being a Mom.

She was spot on....

"A mother is someone that loves you. Before we are born our Moms have us in their stomachs and they go through pain just so we can be born. That's pain in our bodies. After they are born, mothers have a different kind of pain in their hearts because it's a lot of work to take care of us and they worry about us."

And right after Violet finished her talk, 

Cami clapped and cheered in her own little Cami way!

Pure JOY, I tell you. 

I also like what Sabrina 

(on the program) said about her mom:

"I wish my Mom had a pouch 

so I could be with her all the time."

Their bishop's closing remarks also spoke to me...so this isn't an exact quote from him, but as near as I can remember, 

"The older I get the more I realize I want peace and joy in my life. But I've learned I have to cultivate it to have it.

...I pray that you will be kinder to yourself,

and kind and patient with others."

And look at this nice little gift 

the youth gave to all the women present.

Looks like a cupcake with frosting, complete with a fork. 

I have already put it in my freezer 

along with other treats I get that I can't eat.

My grandkids know exactly where they are, 

and help themselves. 

(But they always politely ask first, because that's the kind of grandkids we have.)

I grew up knowing my Grandma made brownies for me.

My grandkids, I'm guessing, 

are growing up happy I'm gluten free.

This helped get me through today.

End of March when Tyler and Karen were here, I was intrigued by all these cards Tyler was making. 

He explained that every day he packs one, along with a note, in Richie's lunch that he takes to school.

Then fast forward to today...while I was here waiting for gum surgery..

 ...Tyler texted me the pictures and notes he made for Richie this week. 
 


I started to tear up while reading them... and I couldn't do that just before "surgery" so I had to save them for later...

But really, they were such a very nice distraction and came just when I needed it.

 Just like Maria said in the Sound of Music...."when you're frightened, think of your favorite things." Or something like that. 

And my children and grandchildren are definitely my favorite things.

PS  When Tyler was a young boy he use to tell me that when he had kids he was going to write them notes. And here we are, all these years later.