Saturday, May 13, 2017

Happy Mother's Day from Grandma Gaynor

While unpacking from our move last August, I came across a talk my Mom had written. Across the 
top of it she had written: "Myrla's Support Group." Not sure if she belonged to that support group, 
or if she was just asked to come speak at it.

She wrote this in Nov of 1982. 35 years ago.

Instead of putting her entire talk on here, I will just share with you her key points. But I won't change 
any of her words. So it's all from her, not me.

So here she is:

"Did you see the article on the new law school dean here in Fresno? 
She sounds like a lovely woman who has the best of both and family. She describes herself as a feminist who 
believes That neither women nor men should be kept from 
doing what makes them happy just because it deviates from the 
cultural norm

My philosophy is that Neither men or women should be kept 
from doing what makes them happy just because it is the 
cultural norm. In other words I feel happy and blessed to be able 
to stay home and take care of my own children, and I would like to 
tell you a little bit about us.

31 years ago I graduated from FSU and got married in the same 
week. I worked for less than a year as a social worker for the 
county welfare and then for a period of 15 years---from 1952 until 
1967 we had 8 children, including twins. I might add right here that 
my husband made the statement once that the nearest he ever came 
to being a mother was when we had twins. He was also good with 
the children but at that time I really needed his help---especially at 
night. When we went to bed we would each choose a baby and be 
responsible for getting up with it all that night. I always tried to 
pick the good one but it was unpredictable.

To get back to my story. In 1955 when we had two children ages 1 
and 3 we joined the Mormon church and that definitely influenced 
our decision to have a large family. Also during the 1950s and 60s a 
lot of people were having large families and it was a natural thing 
to do. I am so glad I wasn't being told on every side that in order to 
be happy and fulfilled I had to have a career. Instead for 26 years I 
have heard at least weekly: 
Families can be together forever
and No other success can compensate for failure in the home
and that The most important work I will ever do in this world 
will be within the walls of our home.
I know it is true that families can be together forever, and a happy 
family on earth is but an earlier heaven. 

I love being a mother. There is nothing I would rather be. It gets 
easier and more rewarding every year. I'm not saying my kids are 
perfect or even that they will follow my example---it's just that I 
enjoy being involved with them. 

Everyone likes an impressive title and "The Mom" is mine. And 
one of my cherished trophies is a gem written by Chris when he 
was 12. He has given it to me for Mother's Day for two or three 
years. Not because it's true but because it saves him money. 
Anyway, I'll share it with you:

Here is a gift I hope you won't miss
A Happy Mother's Day poem to you from Chris. 
There have been many days since I was born
And you've always been there when I've been torn.
There is really one thing I want you to hear.
The best mother in the world is Mrs. Rozier.

I guess what I am trying to say is that when all is said and done in 
this life, it is the RELATIONSHIPS that are most important and 
most lasting. When we leave this world all we take with us is our 
character and the relationships we have formed. 

I agree with the last secretary general of the UN, Dag 
Hammarskjold. He once observed:
"It is more noble to give yourself completely to one individual 
than to labor diligently for the salvation of the masses." Or you 
could change that to a few individuals---your children. 
It is also harder.

A wise man once said, "Those who do not feel pain are not 
capable either of feeling joy."
Maybe that is why there is so much joy in motherhood because 
there is also great pain, misery and growth...because joy always 
involves overcoming. It was planned that way from the beginning. 
This life is the training ground and the next life will be an extension 
of this one....

Every mother's motto should be: "Out of small things proceedeth 
that which is great."  All the little seemingly unimportant things 
we do each day like teaching, listening, guiding, cooking, cleaning 
up after, rocking, reading to, on and on are really very, very 
important. It is evident in children who grow up without this love 
and attention...

I would say to them, and to you, and to me, Make your mark on 
the world---in the hearts of your children. You will be eternally 
blessed if you do. "      Gaynor Rozier


grandmapeg said...

Jill, this is beautiful! I love that you have so many words of your mother to share with others. Your mom was so wise and you can tell that she loved her children! Thank you for sharing this and have a Happy Mother's Day!

Richard said...

There goes mom again...quoting Dag. What an awesome talk!