I understand better now

It finally occurred to me yesterday why my Dad loved the hymn Love at Home so much. He had us sing it every single time we had FHE. Always off key. So grating to my ears. 

I would cringe each time it was the chosen hymn at church. Oh no, not that song again.

Yesterday it was our closing hymn at the end of Sacrament meeting and that’s when it hit me. He heard this song differently than I did.

After his Mom died when he was only 6, so went his happy home. His Dad quickly remarried and his step mom was not very nice to him, or his 5 siblings. They began quickly leaving home as soon as they could. But Dad was only 6, so he had to endure it the longest. 

I’m sure he yearned for what he didn’t have. 

“Roses bloom beneath our feet, All the earth’s a garden sweet.

Making life a bliss complete. When there’s love at home.” 

“There is beauty all around when there’s love at home

There is joy in every sound. When  there’s love at home.”

There is not joy in every sound when you grow up with 7 siblings. Or later, when you parent 4. 

That song always sounded so beyond reality, and laughably sweet, but I’m finally getting it. It sounded like heaven to my Dad. 

I’ve never known anything but a happy home. Growing up, and the ones I raised my kids in, and the one Den and I have together now. 

What I took for granted, my Dad yearned for.  While I didn’t hear “joy in every sound” he probably thought that's how it would be if he just had a Mom and Dad who were there for him. 

What he didn’t have, he wanted for all of us. So he married our angel mother and worked as hard as he could so we could have her with us every day. He learned about family life from her, and then gave it his all as best he could.

This made a huge difference for his posterity after him.

He graduated from this life on Valentine’s Day three years ago today. 

I didn’t thank him enough while he was here, for all he gave to us. Somehow, I hope he knows how grateful I am.

Anyway, that's what I've been thinking today.

Hugging one of his many great grandchildren (Téa) the week before he passed.