Den's stroke at Vons

So this is how it happened. 
(If you don't like details, this is not the post for you. 😊)

It was Monday morning, Aug 19th. I was busy cleaning floors so I asked Den if he'd like to go to the store and pick up a few things.

Our 8 days of precious time with Karen, Tyler, Richie, Leo, Juliet, and Daisy had just ended 2 days before, and we needed to replenish some food.

When Den returned and was carrying in the groceries he casually mentioned what while at the store he kept "stumbling." That sounded odd and like nothing he had mentioned before. He said it kept happening. I said that doesn't sound right. He said, "I'm just out of shape. I need to get more exercise."

Then as he was walking from the kitchen to the family room, he stumbled and nearly fell about 3 times. 

I helped him sit down, and told him not to move. 

He then told me that he had a hard time lifting his right foot off the gas pedal and onto the brake on his drive home. Of course I said, "Why didn't you call me?? You shouldn't have tried driving home after all that stumbling!

He just said he was trying to ignore it and not focus on it. 

At this point I had no idea what was going on. 

I called Kaiser to see if I could get an appt that day. They said, no, but we could get in Wednesday, two days from then.

Meanwhile, Dennis is back up again and walking and stumbling all over the place. I thought, I don't know what's going on, but we're not waiting 2 days to find out.

I call Kaiser back and this time ask to speak to a nurse. I tell her the symptoms, and she says to hold on while she discusses this with the doctor. She gets back on and says the Dr wants me to take him to ER, right now. 

I asked her a few more questions and then she adds, "The doctor says this is serious. These could be stroke symptoms. Just get in the car and go to ER. And if he loses consciousness or quits breaking along the way, pull over and call 911."

So I helped Den out to the car in the garage as he is stumbling terribly and a few times came near to falling on top of me. I get him in there and off we go.

We got about 3 blocks from our home when Den says, "Why don't you take me home and call an ambulance instead?" Enough said, that's what I wanted all along...especially since the nurse mentioned that about going unconscious. 

I bring him back into the house, help him to the couch, and call 911. Then we wait. 

While sitting there on the couch we decided to pray that Dennis would be okay. That's all the words I could think of. But I knew Heavenly Father understood. 

Den now is worried the neighbors will hear the sirens, and that really embarrasses him. I said, don't worry, you know our neighbors never come outside. 

Finally the paramedics arrive and as soon as I open the door they say to me, "Are we here for you?" I almost laughed and wanted to say, "Do I look like the patient?" But I instead said, "No not me, my husband. He's sitting over there." 

They checked him out and off they went.

Den told me later that on the way to the hospital one of the paramedics said he didn't think it was a stroke. I kind of didn't think so either, because isn't a stroke suppose to just affect one side of the body?

So once Den was gone, and I knew he was in good hands, I proceeded to quickly pack food and water should we be at the hospital for awhile. Then I headed on over.

I was a bit nervous about it all, and I prayed a lot while I drove. I was feeling guilty that I had asked Den to do so much that morning. He had been extra tired for months. I should have known something was wrong.

While driving the 30 minutes to the hospital, I thought of a talk I'd heard several years ago, "Come What May and Love It." I decided whether I get to have Dennis with me for 10 more minutes, or 10 more years, I was going to cherish our time together and try not to stress about it. 

I also prayed that I could get a decent parking place. Kaiser is notorious for not having enough parking spaces. 

I feared I would be going round and round looking for somewhere to put my car. I just wanted to get inside quickly and be by my Dennis. 

As soon as I approached ER I spotted ONE empty parking space right close to the ER door....like it was just waiting for me!

I hurried in. As soon as I was by his side a nurse, and then a doctor came to talk with me. They said they already gave Dennis a shot in his stomach...some kind of potent blood thinners they give to stroke patients, or in his case, potential stroke patient. 

I watched as they tested his legs and feet. It was then obvious it was just the right leg that was not working right. I then realized that when a person walks with one bum leg, it looks as though they are both not working. 

He also was confused, and some of the things he said didn't make sense. His voice was a little garbled. His right hand was shaking. 

Next up he had a CT scan of his brain. 

It came back negative which was a good sign. But they warned me they also needed to do an MRI before they could rule out stroke. 

If both the CT scan and the MRI were negative then it wasn't a stroke. Maybe a pinch nerve or some other odd thing, the Dr said, that was causing his right leg to flop around and not work right.

Den and I were calm and it was actually a sweet experience just being there together and watching all that was going on around us. 


At least twice while we were there, a doctor would stop by and say, "This is very serious." Apparently we didn't look worried enough. 

All of the ER nurses, aids, Drs at Kaiser were exceptional. I've been with many people in ERs through the years and never do I remember watching a patient being treated so well. 

Several hours into this an Asian male nurse came up to us and apologized that the light above us was shining so brightly into our eyes. He kept saying, "I am so sorry about that light. So sorry!" I hadn't even noticed it and told him so. Then he said, "You two are such a modest couple. Such a modest couple!" Modest apparently means something else to him than it does to us. But whatever, it was sweet he cared.

I can't drive after dark because I can't see well, so I had to leave by about 7pm. I was assured he would have his MRI soon and then be admitted to a room. 

Not to sound dramatic, but it was hard walking into our home and not having him with me, especially since we didn't know yet what the outcome of all this would be. 

It just didn't feel like my home without him in it.

Around midnight one of the nurses called to tell me the MRI did indeed show a stroke. I probably slept 3 hours at most that night. 

Den stayed from Monday afternoon until Thursday afternoon. The food was terrible, seriously it was. We were told it's made in San Francisco and shipped in trucks the next day. Each meal served to him had steamy plastic over it looking like a Swanson TV dinner. 

But other than that, he had exceptionally kind and attentive and funny nurses that kept us laughing. 

Oddly I did not realize until the last day we were there, that Den could hardly write his name, could not text and could not operate the TV remote. He just said his phone was broken and so was the remote. I thought it was! 

He also was confined to a bed with alarms that would go off if he attempted to get up by himself. A few times I got in bed with him to rest and when I got up, the alarms would loudly blare and in would walk a nurse or two. One of them would announce loudly, "Ah HAH! The wife was in bed with him!" Then we'd all laugh.

The progress Den continues to make each day is amazing! We were told it would take about 6 months to a year to recover but if he keeps recovering at this rate, it won't be nearly that long. 

Having said that, I don't mean to minimize all he is going through now. It's tough having your abilities and independence suddenly change significantly. He gets down, and he's frustrated. Baby steps, literally. 

I have more to tell...but for now...here is an excerpt from the talk that I remembered, the one that gave me strength when I needed it.