Wednesday, November 19, 2014

We just never know.


Whenever I bring my laptop into our bedroom, a sign flashes 
across the screen saying that Clovis Unified School denies access.

This has been going on for over 2 years!

I kept putting off calling the elementary school across the street 
who is "denying access" thinking they would just be really nice 
about it, apologize and then refer me to their main office. In other 
words, they wouldn't know what to do about it either. 

But I had lots of extra time today so I called.

The office lady answered and seemed polite enough at first.

I began: "I have a problem I'm hoping you can help me with or at 
least point me in the right direction. We live on the next street 
over, and we're not able to get the internet in one room of our 
home because Clovis Unified is denying access."

I don't know why that struck a cord with her but it did. She came 
flying back with, "You need to quit using our provider and get one 
of your own."

"I'm not using your provider. We have our own provider, but 
Clovis Unified denies access to our own provider. We don't want 
to be on your provider. "

But before I got that last sentence out completely she interrupted 
me and said, "So what is the name of your provider? What is the 
name of your provider?" she asked me twice. Like she was daring 
me to come up with something

"ATT"

"Well when you go to sign up next time DON'T choose Clovis 
Unified!"

"I'm not choosing Clovis Unified! It just comes on and takes over."

Raising her voice a notch she says, "Mam, I can't help you. I can't 
help you. You need to get your own provider and not use ours"

"But…

"I can't help you!" she interrupts even more irritated.

"Okay, thanks anyway."

Oh my. No progress there. But looking at the clock, when I called, 
it was 3:45. Not probably the best time at an elementary school. 
Maybe this woman was tired, and hungry. Maybe she had a fever 
and sore throat. Maybe her husband just left her. 


Whatever, this little experience gave me the chance to practice 
patience today.

It was easy to do having just read this on another blog today. 
It's written by a man named Hank Smith:

When our doctor told us our 3rd child was due on December 25th, I looked at my wife and said, “Don’t 
you dare.”
"I didn’t know if it would be good or bad for my child to have his birthday be Christmas, but it seemed 
like a lot of stress for a dad, so I prayed we would avoid it.
My wife is a champ.
She held off and our little Elijah made his entrance on December 27th.
After the birth, as I helped Sara get comfortable in the room where she would spend a couple of night 
recovering, I heard people shouting in the room that shared a wall with our room. A man and a woman 
were shouting at each other. We waited for a few minutes, but it didn’t stop. We couldn’t hear what they 
were saying, but they sounded really angry and really frustrated.
As Sara tried to rest she was frequently startled by more yelling.
I thought to myself, “What kind of people yell at each other in a hospital? Are they yelling at each other 
with their baby in there? Besides, didn’t they just celebrate Christmas?”
Anger built up inside of me.
I told Sara I would take care of it.
I felt like a hero as I walked confidently and stone-faced to the nurses station. I let them know that my 
wife had just had a baby and the people in the room next door were making it absolutely impossible for 
her to sleep. The nurse at the desk was flustered, but promised me she would talk to them.
I went back to our room triumphant.
The shouting stopped and Sara slept.
I was a hero.
The next day, as a doctor and I pushed Elijah in his wheeled-crib to another room for a hearing test, the 
doctor pointed at the door of the room where all the shouting had come from the night before. He shook 
his head and said, “Poor couple. Their baby passed away in delivery a few days ago.”
I felt like I had been slapped across the face.
I don’t know why I have to keep learning this lesson the hard way, but my eyes were opened, once 
again, to the reality that everyone you meet is facing a battle you know nothing about.
Be kind.
Always."





13 comments:

Rebecca said...

You are much nicer than me. I do know there are things in people's lives. BUT I also know that if you are paid to do a job you need to do it. And if you have issues that would keep you from doing that job you should not be there. (I think the situation in the hospital is a completely different thing. It was not this couple's job.) I would not have allowed this woman to talk to me this way. I would have told her this is not acceptable, and I needed to talk to her supervisor. As the school secretary, she probably has no clue about the internet. You should call the school district and ask for their internet technical support and I bet they can give you some help. Good luck, that can be frustrating. I think it is probably an issue of your laptop being programed to the fallback of that server and can be fixed easily. We had a similar issue and that was all it took.

Rebecca said...

Also, I forgot to say, that doctor violated the couple's privacy by disclosing information about them and he could be fined and lose his job for doing so. I was just having this talk with someone about this and patient confidentiality. However I do get what you are saying, and it is good to remember to be nice too!

Grandma Honey said...

Rebecca…I'm not always nice. That's why I have to continually read and hear stories like that hospital one. My goal is to assume that everyone is going through something very difficult at the time. But my moods sometimes override that. And watch out if I'm hungry.

I know what you mean about patient's rights to privacy. But sometimes it doesn't work as it should. One time during one of my Dad's stay in the hospital, the patient in the bed next to him would keep track of everything the Dr said to my Dad. So when I came in I'd get info from my Dad's roommate! When the day came for Dad to be released , we waited and waited for Dr's going home instructions. Finally I just decided to ask the roommate and he knew everything. I thanked him and we took my Dad home. The next day Den and I went to bring this roommate a little gift of thanks. He wasn't him his room! So I found the nurse and asked where my Dad's former roommate was. I know they should have said "we can't tell you", but instead she gave me his name, and his new room number and exactly how to get there. When we walked into his room he was so happy to see us.

Grandma Honey said...

Oh and last night, Den figured out how to keep Clovis Unified off my laptop. He had fixed it many times before but it always came back the next day. Now he has set it up for me that I just can click Clovis off whenever they are denying me.

McKenna Heasley said...

I cried reading this story! I have learned this principle so many times in my life, but this was a wonderful reminder.

Grandma Honey said...

I've been thinking more about this Rebecca…you come from a different view point than me since your husband is a dentist. He has to be so careful all the time, I'm sure. Where as the rest of us, who don't have a practice, often roll our eyes at all the privacy acts and HIPAA. Like the very day my sons turned 18 suddenly I could not even talk to their Dr about them. This was the same Dr I'd been taking them to since they were born, and I knew the staff fairly well too. Nope, suddenly I couldn't even call and ask a simple question. I felt like saying, "Come on, it's me, remember?"

Rebecca said...

ha it is true. John is VERY careful with HIPPA. He never ever tells me a single thing about his patients, not even if one of my adult kids come to visit him! A funny thing, I sent Jake for his mission dental exam. I always would ask John after, "so, how did they do, any cavities?" WELL this time, I asked and John said to me "sorry Sweetie, he is 18, I can't tell you anymore......" That was a HUGE shocker to me!!!!

Karen Mortensen said...

Wow.

Fisher Family Fun said...

You should be able to program your WIFI to forget the Clovis ELementary School wifi access. Wifi will look for the strongest signal and that can be why you get the result. Give AT&T a call and see if they can help you also. That is what we get paid for. :)
When I had Riley, the couple next to us slept through the baby crying at night. The nurses kept having to wake them up to take care of the baby.

Scrapally said...

I cannot even imagine you NOT being nice! You were way more civil to that secretary than I probalby would have been. Hope you have the internet thing all figured out. That is crazy! I too usually give people the benefit of the doubt, knowing that everyone has things going on in their lives...but sometimes attitude can beget attitude. lol. I need to try harder. Thanks for the lovely story. Oh, also, when our kids turn 18 and we can't talk to the dr. anymore about them, but they still let us pay the bills!

Grandma Honey said...

Thank you Rhonda….I will do that!…on another note, I wonder if that Mom who didn't hear her baby cry was over drugged. Can't imagine not hearing your own baby cry, especially as a newborn.

Grandma Honey said...

Scrapally….what that secretary was saying was so absurd that I didn't want to go there. And I hear you about the still paying the bills of the 18 year old…the Dr's office doesn't forget us when it comes to that!

Jennifer Bramwell said...

If you talked to the secretary at the elementary school. She is always like that. I don't like having questions.